I did not choose fandom life. Fandom life stopped me on a staircase and said “excuse me, can I ask you a question? I’m new here.”
reasons u should adopt me as ur pet
- i have soft hair on my head as welll as soft little hairs all over my arms and legs
- i don’t talk much, i am ve ry quiet
- i will let u boop my nose whenever
- i am expert at cuddling
- easy 2 care for, all i need is food and sunshiney spots to sleep in
- please if u don’t take me they’ll put me in a college and make me do the essays
olgg:
If I was a famous actor and had a horde of fangirls, I would stay single, and every time an interviewer asked me about my love life, I’d answer that “there’s this one girl I saw at a meeting with fans. I don’t know her name, because of all the fuss with the autographs, and I have only seen her once, but I’m in love with her.” I’d say that, looking all sad and lonely.
Imagine all the fangirls’ faces.
just calm down a second there, satan
When you rearrange the letters in the word ‘ASTRONOMER’, you get ‘MOON STARER’.
Same goes for DESPERATION = A ROPE ENDS IT,
THE EYES = THEY SEE,
THE MORSE CODE = HERE COME DOTS,
DORMITORY = DIRTY ROOM,
SLOT MACHINES = CASH LOST IN ME,
ELECTION RESULTS = LIES - LET’S RECOUNT,
SNOOZE ALARMS = ALAS! NO MORE Z’S
THE EARTHQUAKES = THAT QUEER SHAKE,
ELEVEN PLUS TWO = TWELVE PLUS ONE
and
MOTHER-IN-LAW = WOMAN HITLER.
WAIT BUT THIS IS MY FAVORITE ONE:
HOLMES AND WATSON = WOMANLESS AND HOT
DESTIEL = LET’S DIE
MERTHUR - HURT ME
